What Happens When You Say "Yes"?

Several years ago I saw the Jim Carey movie, Yes Man.  The premise is that he’s a negative guy whose life is boring because he says no to everything.  He decides to begin saying yes all the time, so of course, hilarious situations result.

This movie inspired me to look at my life, and I realized that the basic premise is true.  When I say no to things, my life is quiet and dull.  I often let laziness, fear of the unknown, looking stupid, rejection or looking foolish, stop me from saying yes.  Then I feel stagnant and nothing happens in my life.  I’m so busy trying to stay “safe”, that I don’t make room for all of the good new things to come in.

I noticed that when I ignore my fears and objections, and am open to new experiences, wonderful, fun things happen.

I decided to begin saying yes to things unless there is a good reason to decline (laziness, fear of looking foolish or of the unknown are not good reasons.)

As a result, I’ve recently accepted several speaking engagements, taken on new volunteer commitments, met lots of fun and interesting people, and made new friends.

I’ve also had the opportunity to stretch my comfort zone, which makes me feel even stronger and more empowered.  Also, these experiences have helped me realize I can do things I didn’t know I could do, and as a result, I have grown.

So this month I’m reflecting on how much more fun and interesting life is when I’m open to new things, and I’m focusing on just saying yes to life.

What about you?

Please comment so others can benefit from your wisdom and experience

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Adaptability

Recently there have been a lot of changes in my life, and I realized that I’m resisting accepting and adapting to them.  I’m happy with the familiar and staying in my comfort zone, and don’t want things to change.  However, this resistance is just making everything more difficult.

While visiting my grandchildren recently we played a game where we looked at all the things that have changed since I was a child.  We talked about the amazing conveniences and technology they have now, that didn’t exist when I was young.  It was a fun and educational exercise for them, and a new awareness for me. I was astonished to realize how much things had changed, and how I had actually let go of the old, moved on to the new, and created a different comfort zone with these new things.  I became aware of how much change we all have to adapt to, every day!

So, this month I’m reflecting on the importance of being flexible and adaptable in my business and personal life.  When a new idea or technology comes along, my first inclination is to say, “No thanks, I don’t need that.  The old way works fine.”  However, that may not be completely true.  The old way may have worked fine in the past, but does it still, and will it in another year or two?

Will clinging to the old way make my life easier, or put me at a disadvantage?  In business my competitors will probably be using the new methods, which will help them serve their clients faster and more conveniently.  What will happen to me if I don’t keep up and can’t provide better service too?

In my personal life, doing things the way I have always done them might feel safe, but it will interfere with my enjoyment or interaction with my family and friends.  For example, if I choose to not learn how to operate my technology devices such as the video part of my phone (which I am sorely tempted to do because I HATE IT when an inanimate object gets the best of me!) I will lose the incredible joy I get from preserving special moments in the lives of my children and grandchildren.  Do I really want to do that, just because it’s a challenge to learn the new way?  Probably not!

Also, if I’ve noticed that when some people become negative or toxic, is it smart to keep them in my life just because they’ve been there for a while?  Again, probably not!

I know that even with positive changes, there is sometimes grief in letting go of what was as I incorporate the new.

I understand that in the process of letting go, or of changing, I might experience the stages of the grief process.  I’m prepared to deal with the shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression and final acceptance, because it will eventually lead me to a happier place.

So I’ve decided to stop clinging to what feels familiar and safe.  Stop looking back at how ‘it’s always been’.  Instead I will look forward, adopt a positive attitude, believe I can do it, and embrace the changes life brings.

How about you? 

Sandy is a best selling author, speaker, Licensed Counselor, and life and business coach. She is the author of the best selling book Feeling Good About You and Moving Up To Management for New Supervisors (available on Amazon.com) and is the creator of the amazing Feeling Good About You Breakthrough program. . You can visit Sandy on her website at www.insidejobscoach.com .

If you’d like to increase your self-esteem and personal power, Sandy has a great package she’d like to share with you.  Just click here to receive your Rapid Power Pack and begin to create the life you’ve always dreamed of.