Tuesday, August 21, 2018

What Happens When You Say "Yes"?

Several years ago I saw the Jim Carey movie, Yes Man.  The premise is that he’s a negative guy whose life is boring because he says no to everything.  He decides to begin saying yes all the time, so of course, hilarious situations result.

This movie inspired me to look at my life, and I realized that the basic premise is true.  When I say no to things, my life is quiet and dull.  I often let laziness, fear of the unknown, looking stupid, rejection or looking foolish, stop me from saying yes.  Then I feel stagnant and nothing happens in my life.  I’m so busy trying to stay “safe”, that I don’t make room for all of the good new things to come in.

I noticed that when I ignore my fears and objections, and am open to new experiences, wonderful, fun things happen.

I decided to begin saying yes to things unless there is a good reason to decline (laziness, fear of looking foolish or of the unknown are not good reasons.)

As a result, I’ve recently accepted several speaking engagements, taken on new volunteer commitments, met lots of fun and interesting people, and made new friends.

I’ve also had the opportunity to stretch my comfort zone, which makes me feel even stronger and more empowered.  Also, these experiences have helped me realize I can do things I didn’t know I could do, and as a result, I have grown.

So this month I’m reflecting on how much more fun and interesting life is when I’m open to new things, and I’m focusing on just saying yes to life.

What about you?

Please comment so others can benefit from your wisdom and experience

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1 comment:

  1. A few years ago I took a few improv classes based on the concept of "yes and" to carry forward the story line. The "and" picked up by each team player took us to unusual and hilarious places that made the classes very enjoyable. I did fairly well as a being newbie in the beginning classes. Further along in more advanced classes I found myself confronted with what I considered distasteful circumstances like ending up in the story line as a worker being compelled to pluck the feathers off a chickens by hand. I found myself resistant to the thought which led to a big Debbie Downer - the opposite of everything we've been taught. I could have come up with a McGiver scenario whereby piecing together everyday objects I no longer had to pluck by hand, and viola - naked chickens to roast galore for everyone...but I resisted and wondered to this day what inside of me made me take the opposite turn. Am I that programmed for negative speak that I can't let go and accept the inevitable? What skills do I need to overcome such thinking and go with the flow to be happy? Resistance in improv is the death nell and the more advanced players complained to the instructor about allowing newbies to join in. It amazes me that I still think of this on occasion overthinking my mistake rather than letting that go. Seems like a red flag that needs clarity. Way too serious about a made up story. What's going on I wonder. Likewise, I let intolerances bother me like screeching chalk on a blackboard at times. Perhaps it comes down to a failure to set boundaries and have difficult conversations fearing rejection. Reminds me of snowflake tendencies that spirals into negative thought. Not always -- depends upon how well I am feeling. Then I fear coming off an intolerant bitch. Words of wisdom encouraged.